Review #7 Avery Brewing Co: Dépuceleuse

One of my beer guys at work told me about this beer just after ordering it.  Immediately the words zinfandel barrel-aged, and sour cherries peaked my interest.  This is the 4th beer in the series of Wild Ales that Avery is producing, which really don't conform to any standard style or categories.  I knew I would have to snag one when they came in, I mean c'mon, sour cherries?  I love sour things!  (Beers included).

When the beer came in I was alerted and went to grab a bottle before they hit the shelf.  Then they pointed out the name.  Funny.  Nice giggle factor.  I have definitely had a few good chuckles with it, especially when customers ask about it, or try to phonetically sound it out.  Go ahead, do it.  Cute, huh?

On to the beer itself.  It pours a hazy reddish copper, with just a tiny bit of creamy head that doesn't stick around too long.  Aromas of oak, cherries, wine and a little funk give it a pretty awesome character.  It's almost prickly, but still creamy carbonation (probably from the Brettanomycyes fermentation), gives way to a really pleasing sour beer.  It's tart, and sour, and pretty much tastes just like a Flemish, only with a great flavor of oak, and a hint of zinfandel from start to finish.  It is very easy to drink, and I really couldn't tell that it clocks in at 9.59% ABV.

OK, so what now?:  If you like sours, definitely give this one a try if you can find it.  It has me excited for the rest of the barrel-aged series from Avery as they become available.  Who knows what they will come up with next?

Review #6 Founders Brewery: Kentucky Breakfast Stout

This is one of those beers that you hear about constantly.  Everyone is talking about it like its gods gift to humanity in a bottle.  But, you just can't seem to get your hands on it.  From the initial rumblings I had heard about Founders while living in San Francisco, I couldn't wait to someday try some of their beer.  Luckily, Founders has made its way to NYC, and I could finally see what all of the hype has been about. Coincidentally, the hype is well deserved.

I can't say much about this beer except- buy it.  Do it now.  Stop reading, open a new tab, and try to Google where you can get some.

... Ok, are you back now?  Whether you found some, or didn't (make sure you do next year), what you are about to experience is going to be amazing.

It pours absolutely black with a light tan head that diminishes very quickly.  It's nose is a heavy bourbon whiskey, with coffee, chocolate, and a little oatmeal.  The bourbon continues as you drink, from beginning to end, being paired at the start with the oatmeal, some malt, and some maple syrup; and finishing with the coffee and chocolate.   It's pretty much perfect. 

I have had it on draft several times now, and in the bottle for breakfast.  What, it was my day off, and its has breakfast in the name.  Each and every time it is a wonderful taste sensation that makes me want it more and more.

What I say:  I think I have already been over that.  Order it if you see it on draft.  If you find some bottles, grab 'em.  I bought all I could afford at the time, and they are currently sitting in my cellar until a special occasion (like breakfast) arises, or in case someone who can't find it in their area wants to do a beer trade.  I probably won't part with it too easily though, just sayin'.

Review #5 Three beers from my hometown craft brewery

It's time for the Hometown Beer review!  Lancaster, or The Lanc-Lanc, has been putting itself on the craft beer map for a little while now, you know, since 1810 when it was producing 7% of the beer for the whole U.S.  Enough history, let's just get on to the beers.  These are 3 of the 4 beers that come in the variety 12 pack (what's missing is the Strawberry Wheat- my fave- which I drank all of and didn't save a bottle.  Just order it, it is epic.)

The variety 12 pack is shaped like an origami barn.  How cute!  It's fun!  Amish people, barns- get it?  O.K., I am killing space.  Why you ask?  Because the beer on the top-left (Amish Four Grain) isn't really worth drinking.  Sorry LMB, hometown, and friends.  This is way too bitter for a Pale Ale, and tastes really funky.  Like swamp funky.  You might like it though, if you like that sort of thing.  If you do, please contact me about my new script for 'Toxic Avenger 3D'.  I will be pitching it soon.

Now on to the Milk Stout.  It's creamy, almost buttery, silky smooth, with notes of burnt caramel, and a nice finish- wait is that- OMG yes it is, it tastes like marshmallows floating in coffee and cream.  This beer is ridiculous.  Ridiculously good that is.  I have never tasted a milk stout like it, nor a stout for that matter.

I can imagine drinking this beer ice cold in the middle of summer and not blinking an eye.  It's the Yoo-Hoo of beer.  The fresh Amish chocolate milk for adults that the Central Market should be serving on a daily basis.  Cot Damney, this beer is amazing.  So easy to drink.  Heavy, but oddly light.  This is a beer to be treasured.  It ALMOST makes me want to drive home again just to have it.

One more:
If the Hop Hog is one thing, it ain't hoppy.  Reminds me more of a traditional Pale than anything else.  It has some really amazing cherry, pine, and dry hop notes in the nose.  It has an underlying malty sweetness that dominates the rest of the flavor of the brew.  This is NOT a problem for me as I would prefer most of my beers this way.  The pour is caramel/golden and has little head.  The carbonation is perfect in the bottle and on draft.  The warthog drawing is pretty awesome too.

WWKD (What Would Kenny Do): If you want a mind blowing IPA, sorry.  If you want a great Pale Ale, get the Hop Hog.  If you want ecstasy in liquid form get the Milk Stout, Strawberry Wheat, or the sinfully sweet Shoo-Fly Porter.  They also have awesome food and some other great seasonal brews.  If you happen to be in the Lanc-Lanc, it is a definite must visit.

Review #4 The Bruery: Saison de Lente

I love saisons.  Their appearance on the beer market means that it is spring, and soon to be summer.  All of them vary so greatly in taste, aroma, and finish that you kind of have to try each and every one you can get your hands on.  But this beer pissed me off.  I am impatient, always punctual, and kind of expect my beer to be the same- ready to drink when I want it.

So I open this bottle, recommended to me by a co-worker, and BAM!  There is enough carbonation in here to scare Ralphie from 'A Christmas Story' into never drinking a beer in his life.  I literally thought I shot my eye out.  I pour a glass of the beer, and by beer I mean head.  Lots of it.  It takes up 75% of the glass with its amazing aromas of citrus, flowers, yeast, and peppercorns.  I figure I just need to wait a second, but no, it doesn't let up.  This head is here to stay- at least as long as the beer is cold.  So I wait.  And wait.  After about 15 minutes I am able to make an actual glass of beer appear by sloooowly adding more from the bottle as the head sloooowly dies.  Thank God because I really want to drink this!

Underneath the everlasting one inch head lies fruity notes, a great yeasty flavor, some wonderful bitters, a nice hop kick, and a great peppery finish that I detected in the nose.  It was spicy, dry, fruity, oh hell; it was each and every thing a great saison should be.  Absolutely delicious.

What it do: Totally awesome.  Just do yourself a favor and drink another beer while you start pouring this.  Unless you aren't overly impatient like me, but with something this good, it is hard not to be.

Review #3 Oskar Blues: Gubna

Let me preface this review with this: I am not a hop head. A lot of IPAs are far too hoppy for my liking, although I am getting used to them and learning to appreciate them more. But then there was the fated afternoon I met the Gubna.

I was at an industry tasting in Manhattan, casually drinking my way around the U.S. Brewery Room (coincidentally missing the Brew Dog Tactical Nuclear Penguin and Sink the Bismark! tastings...) when I came up to the Oskar Blues table. At that point I had imbibed all of the widely available offering from the Blues, and was about to settle for a taste of my fave- the Ten Fiddy. Then a light shone down from above and the kind gentleman asked if we had heard of their newest offering, which would be available in a few short weeks. I shrugged my shoulders as he poured me some of the golden liquid with a thin head I would later know as The Gubna. My outlook on IPAs would be forever changed. I took a deep breath. Huge hops (100 IBUs), large hints of pine, and some good orange and grapefruit citrus notes. The taste was malty, a little sweet, and still held some of the citrus and pine. It had a heavy mouth feel, and you could definitely taste the alcohol content (10% ABV). The hops come in and finish off the beer on the back end in a big way. It is surprisingly easy to drink, even for me. I have had it a few times since, all in cans, and it has not disappointed. Nice one, Oskar Blues.

What I say: Whether you like IPAs or don't. Get you some! At least once.

Review #2 Stone, Ken Schmidt, Maui: Kona Coffee, Macadamia, Coconut Porter

So I suppose I will do the first collab in this series next, kind of working backwards, but whatever.

This wondrous creation of all that is good in the world tastes like a chocolate macaroon being served with a great cup of coffee. I really dig porters, but I have been not so happy with most of the ones I have recently tried. It's not that they were bad, they just weren't something special. This brew ends that streak.

It pours out black, with little to no head. Then it punches you in the nose with a HUGE sweetened coconut right hook, and follows up with a left jab of coffee and chocolate. It's silky and smooth to the taste where the coffee takes over, and the coconut and chocolate become a pleasant backdrop. Then you get some nice fruity hints from the hops. But wait- there's more! Just as it hits the back of your tongue and you are ready to swallow you get a nice kick of tasty roasted macadamia nut goodness. OMG!

My verdict: This beer should be available all the time! I would shell out the $6.99 to drink 12 ounces of this again and again. But it's not, so I have cellared a few for a rainy day, as you should too.

Review #1 21st Amendment, Firestone Walker, Stone Brewery El Camino (Un)Real Ale

The second this beer was ready to hit the shelf at work I snagged one and was pumped to drink it. I love strong ales of all types, but was especially ready to try this one because of all of the odd ingredients put into the brew. Fennel seeds, figs, pink peppercorns and chia seeds. I mean, who puts chia seeds (one of the newer health food fads) into a beer? But hey, I like all three breweries on the collab, and knew it would be awesome. It did not disappoint.

Once you pour this 12 ounces of joy into your glass, you will notice that it is almost pitch black and has a nice tan head that hangs around for a long time. It has a nice grassy, floral, peppercorn, and tobacco aroma which only made me want to drink it more. Once I did, I was delighted by the sweet fig (almost date) flavor that blended perfectly with the dark chocolate malts, hints of caramel, and slight citrus notes. This beer has girth, it's meaty, creamy, kind of chewy, and you can barely tell that it has an ABV of 9.5%. It kind of reminded me of the perfect adult granola bar.

My verdict: I bought more. You should get some if you can. But beware, it goes down VERY easy for a 9.5%, and could be dangerous.

I love beer.

Odds are, if you are reading this you do too. Or you might just know me from csadelivery, or from drinking beers with me somewhere. I decided to start a beer blog because of how much awesome beer I drink (especially now working in the beer industry), and for the simple fact that I should have done it years ago.

I love craft brews, and have always been in search of the best beer possible- ever since we were able to buy beer at the tender age of 16. (ooooh fake IDs, and beards). I have East and West Coast roots and love all of the things that go into all the craft beers from both areas, and everywhere in between.

But let's get down to the meat of the situation. There are other beer bloggers whom I love, and enjoy their preciseness and well written reviews. I am not going to be one of them, mostly because I can't quantify a number or star system. This blog will be all about me drinking beer and giving it to you real. If I get stuck on a review, you best bet I am going to reference other blogs, but my rating system will range between:

HELLL NAW- I will never put this in my mouth again.
meh- might be good for the price
OMFG THIS IS SO AMAZING!- self explanatory

So I am gonna drink it. I will tell you what I think. I won't be as concise as all the blogs I (and hopefully you) will read, [see links at right] but I hope to give you some realtalk on what I think are great, and not-so-great brews.

Man I am rambling, good thing I am honestlydrunk. Damn Avery- Depuceluece (please read into the name), and the Firestone, Stone, 21A collab. (reviews to follow).

Anyway, drink up. Have a good time. Be safe.

Kenny

Follow me on Twitter: kennyfuncore